Before OA:
Confused
Alienated
Resentful
Offended
Lonely
After OA:
Compassionate
Amazed
Recovering
Optimistic
Loving
— Carol D.
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Author: Nimda
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Article 6 – New Intergroup Series
Have you had a time where you were lost in program? How did you find your way?
I’m lost right now. I have been in OA 14 months. This is my 1st in-person meeting. I have struggled, done well, then not so well. I have not gained – just binge, then do my food plan – then binge.
What frustrates me is that I “know” what to do – been AA 35 years, 8 years clean!
I want this program – one day at a time – but have not been willing to give up sugar. I want to want to.
— Anonymous
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Article 5 – New Intergroup Series
Have you had a time where you were lost in program? How did you find your way?
I’m only in program 2-1/2 months. I started on the OA.org website and listened and read EVERYTHING on the site. Within 3 weeks I felt lost and stuck and knew I’d need to take the 1 hour drive weekly to get to a face-to-face meeting to REALLY make this work over the long run. Then, once in the meet it took three weeks to get past my next lost & stuck spot: I would need a sponsor. I make the meeting in person and have a sponsor and I don’t feel lost anymore. I feel I’m home, just the way I am greeted at the meetings.
— Anonymous
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Article 4 – New Intergroup Series
Have you had a time where you were lost in program? How did you find your way?
First year and a half, I knew I was in the right place but could not “figure out” the solution. So I kept coming back hearing my story. Not abstinent, in my disease, I had to admit desperation, powerlessness and reach out for help. Recovery arrived in the form of a food plan and abstinence, a sponsor to guide me and working the 12 Steps to the best of my ability. My joy in recovery – first and foremost – is a relationship and trust in a Higher Power. My joy is I am one among many in a program of people interested in helping – themselves and each other. I love watching loneliness vanish, seeing my fellowship grow up around me.
— Susan H
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Article 3 – New Intergroup Series
Have you had a time where you were lost in program? How did you find your way?
It seems so basic, but when I felt lost I was going to meetings, using the tools and doing the steps. I don’t think I was in relapse but I felt far from God and alone. I was calling people occasionally but it was that lost feeling that troubled me.
Then I realized that I don’t have to feel God to know His presence. He is with me, there waiting for me to do His will whether I feel like it or not. We give our life and will to our Higher Power and do what He asks us to do whether we feel close to him or not.
— Yvonne C
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Article 2 – New Intergroup Series
Have you had a time where you were lost in program? How did you find your way?
When I started program, I had committed to stick with it since it was the only thing that had ever worked. I’ve lost over 100 pounds and have kept if off for 12 years. It’s the last stop for me.
— KB
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Article 1 – New Intergroup Series
Have you had a time where you were lost in program? How did you find your way?
I’ve been in major relapse twice in the 21 years I’ve been in program. I have never left program but the way back was always program and MORE program. I would commit to 90 meetings in 90 days, wrote every day, make 3 phone calls a day, commit my food to a sponsor daily and weighed and measured my food – and prayed.
My recovery is visible in many ways. I have lost 100 pounds and gone from a Size 20 to a Size 10. People say I look younger, but I don’t think that’s just about my appearance; they see that I am more active, agile, and confident. My doctor can surely see my recovery. My weight loss and increased activity have lowered my blood pressure and blood sugar, and I have been able to eliminate prescription drugs for those conditions. My family is grateful for my recovery because I now participate in physical activities without fear, dread, or embarrassment. But nobody but me knows about some very special evidence of my recovery.
My mom died eight years ago. I inherited all of her jewelry. Some of the pieces were valuable, but all were precious to me, especially ones she bought while traveling. She was partial to turquoise jewelry made by Native Americans. I loved her silver and turquoise bracelet that had a very unusual design.
It was too small for my large wrist. I am just big boned, I said to myself. I tried to wear it several times, but the magnetic clasp gave way as soon as I flexed my wrist. I lost it once for weeks until I found it under my car mat. Another time, a neighbor found it on the ground in our parking lot. I finally decided it was just too precious for me to take a chance losing it again, so I put it in my jewelry box.A couple years into the program, while I was maintaining my weight loss, I came across the bracelet and I tried it on. I was amazed when it fit! I wear it all the time now. It is a precious reminder of my mother and my recovery. Mom had always worried about my health, and she would have been so happy to see the new me.
I wrote a poem of gratitude for the miracles that I have received for persistently “coming back” these last 38 years in OA:
The Past is littered with resentments.
Fear haunts the Future.
The Present is a Gift, safe and joyful!
The Road to Humility is paved with Surrender mixed with Acceptance.
The Destination is Sacred Awe.
— Beverly B.
I used to run in circles all the time. I had to get this done and that done; be here and take someone there; and all-in-all I never caught the tail, but I was proving I was good in the chase. No more. That tail can remain at the end and be at peace. I am kinder to myself. I am accepting of what I can and what I cannot do. I find “no” is okay to say.
I can allow myself to feel frustrated, and then “Let Go”. I can be angry, justified anger, feel it, and then “Let Go”. To not “Let Go” means I wallow in it and I refuse to do that. Recovery. No tail chasing for this ol’ gal.
— Debi S